10 Best Dating Advice Books For Women
(and men if you’re brave enough to read them!)
I really could have used some of this advice when I was 17 or so but since I’m divorced and starting over it can’t hurt to figure out men before I’m too old to care about their advances. As a 42 year old woman I have had some first time meets that were downright crazy after getting my divorce. You can believe they never became second meet studs after seeing red flags within an hour of knowing them. Truthfully, I would never have known what to look for without the advice I found within these books and quite a few others–but the ones I’m sharing with you in this blog are the 10 best dating advice books of the bunch. I only serve the best for my readers! So I’m going to tell you why every book listed is worth reading and what the real gem of each book is so you are ready to brave the dating world like a champ. Ready to swipe to the right? Well let’s go!
1.”40 Dates & 40 Nights-Love @ First Swipe” by Amy Main
Why you should read it: It’s funny. It’s sweet. It’s real. Seriously though, this book made me laugh, scream, cry and reminisce about my own crazy dates as I witnessed Main rolling through all 40 dates like a boss! A challenge like the one she went through is not for the faint-hearted. After all, it’s hard work being on your best behavior for just one new potential soul-mate, but 40 potential soul-mates in 40 days? Seemingly impossible…but she did it! And all through only one dating site: Tinder. This book shows you all of the pit-falls and benefits of dating through a site that is geared towards instant gratification and just the power of pictures! It also shows that Tinder does have the potential to help you find your one-and-only, lifetime partner and not just with shallow people.
Book gem: The way this book reads like a diary is probably the best part. You get a peek into Main’s world for 40 days and nights and nothing is held back…well except maybe real names of suitors to protect their honor and dignity.
2.”You Probably Shouldn’t Write That” by Lisa Hoehn
Why you should read it: You should definitely read about why you shouldn’t write your dating profile without help from an expert. This book explains point-by-point, why your profile isn’t working to get you a date, much less, a look-see. Hoehn goes over what makes a good profile picture stand out and helps you to get your profile trimmed to perfection. I have to admit after reading this I definitely feel a need to hire a paparazzi to take pictures of me as my selfies have me looking lonely, when I’m really not. This book had me re-vamping everything in my dating site profiles to enhance my chances of meeting my future life-long partner. Now I just have to get myself a tripod to create interesting images of my life. Or become famous so that they can see I lead an interesting, if somewhat mellow, life.
Book gem: The chapter on making the most of your messages was chock full of all kinds of advice regarding that elusive first message that we all hope to get, and yet, dread to send. This is a chapter that deserves to be memorized as it really is important how you do, or do not, communicate on a dating website.
3. “Not Your Mother’s Rules” by Ellen Fein & Sherrie Schneider
Why you should read it: While my mother gave me all kinds of advice on a variety of topics, she never gave me any rules for dating. This is probably because I never dated in high school. No wonder I was so bad at it after getting freshly divorced (and no Momma, you are not to blame). In this book you learn all the rules a girl should hear before making any attempt to date guys. There are definite rules for getting to the date, primping for the date, having the date and dealing with what comes after the date. What is a date? Well a one or two hour meet is not a date. A meet is nothing more than a formality to help you decide if that person is date-material. A date is when you are taken out and given some idea of how a person is when they are in an element that they enjoy being in. A date should help pave the way for more dates. A date should be fun and well…you want more information on dates? Invest in this book which covers everything about what a dating life should be if you really want to find the one that you want to date forever.
Book gem: Rule #6 is number one in my book. There should be some buffer when it comes to texting. After all, despite the fact that we live in a digital age, we still need face-to-face time. That can’t happen if you text each other all day and night. And how is housework or work-work supposed to happen when you are glued to a phone with two hands feverishly tapping out LOL’s? This chapter rule covers all the basics of texting and why it should not replace face-time.
4. “Love @First Click” by Laurie Davis
Why you should read it: When you want an expert answer you find an expert to answer you, and Davis is just the expert you need. Davis, the Founder of eFLIRT EXPERT, gives her expert tips to readers about how to go about finding a loving partner through online dating. This book covers every aspect of online dating: how to flirt, how to date multiple people without feeling overwhelmed or guilty, how to protect yourself online and off, how to set up a profile and much, much more. There are even chapters on how to work it out with the one you decide to keep as a partner from your online dating excursions. This is truly a must-have book for anyone who has never tried online dating or who has tried it and did not find a partner. This book is perfect for online daters of every age.
Book gem: Chapter 8 concerning online dating red flags should be Core Online Dating Course 101 for anyone getting ready to date online.
5. “It’s Just A F****** Date” by Greg Behrendt & Amira Ruotola
Why you should read it: Things get real in this email-advice laden book. Mr. Behrendt and Ms. Ruotola go back and forth spitting out very real advice for the confused modern man and woman. To the point, it’s just a f****** date and not the end of the world if confusing things happen while you are dating a new honey, an old beau, or a slew of unsavory, unhappy and just as confused people. This book has all kinds of advice for boys and girls on how to treat a date like it is just another thing going on in your life. When you think about it, isn’t it really? There is no reason to stress yourself out about the details when you read this book. It really is just a f****** date.
Book gem: The second date assessment quiz that will give you a solid way to figure out whether or not you want to go on a second f****** date with someone.
6. “How To Date Men” by Janis Spindel
Why you should read it: This book is needed if you haven’t dated in a long time and don’t know what the heck you’re doing. Spindel gives you solid advice on what to do to find a date, what to do while on a date and how to handle the aftermath of rejection or the flurry of dates to follow. There are even chapters devoted for what to do if the relationship gets deeper and every section in the book offers a section on gently saying “Goodbye!” to your suitor so he isn’t completely put off on dating another girl forever.
Book gem: Spindel’s “Not What You’re After” section in the book, along with her “Warning” section, help you see the warning signs of someone who may not be the right one for you. Ladies…forewarned is forearmed. Be smart and guard your feelings carefully by reading this book.
7. “Fine I’ll Go Online” by Leslie Oren
Why you should read it: Everyone should have a publicist in this age of digital opulence. Especially one that is geared for Hollywood types. Oren explains, as any great publicist will, about the hits and misses you might be making with your online dating profile. This book explains, from beginning the process of dating to the first real-life date, what you should do to make others need you like they need the next hot and thrilling movie from Tinseltown. Treat yourself like the hot star that you really are and show those potential suitors what they’ll miss if they skip over messaging you.
Book gem: The information on contacting men is invaluable. Even though I am very traditional I have tried some of these tips and they really do work to get the attention every star strives for.
8. “He’s Just NOT That Into You” by Greg Behrendt & Liz Tuccillo
Why you should read it: If you’ve seen the movie with the same name you understand the premise. Boy meets girl, girl falls for boy, boy shows no interest, girl becomes obsessed, boy decides to move to Siberia and change his name. Oh wait! That didn’t happen in the movie. That’s what happens in real life, instead, when girls don’t understand the subtle language that men use with women when they just don’t want a relationship with them. In this book you’ll learn from a real guy and girl all about these subtle, and not-so-subtle, clues that guys desperately try to throw at you when they don’t want to have anything to do with you. Mr. Behrendt lays it all down on the line and gives up the goods on exactly what is going on with a variety of scenarios while Ms. Tuccillo is sweet and sassy and helps the reader to realize what she has realized…that Greg is spot on.
Book gem: The check off list that you get at the end of every chapter sums up everything that was read in a beautifully-short, one-page list.
9. “121 First Dates” by Wendy Newman
Why you should read it: This book lets you follow Wendy as she plows through 121 first dates, most of which came through using online dating websites. As she dispenses helpful advice based on her many experiences in dating she recants the details of individual dates. All of which are very real and candid. Some dating suitors ended up on the “never again” list while others placed well in the “maybe” category and some were found to be better left as friends. All dates were the experience of a lifetime because, let’s face it, you can only find your one-and-only if you have sifted through and removed all the ones that are in the way first. This book explains, in very down-to earth language, why you should date as many suitors as possible. Even if you think they aren’t suitable for you.
Book gem: Her chapter on “Do’s and Don’t for the First Date” is so spot on and she gives a perfect example of why you should always go with your gut feelings when meeting someone new.
10. “Love In 90 Days” by Diana Kirschner, PHD
Why you should read it: This book offers a multi-step program to find true love within 90 days! The program Kirschner created involves lessons to help you learn to love yourself, exercises to help you realize your normal dating patterns and a dating strategy to change how you date so that you can find the right man for you. I actually tried this technique for awhile but it isn’t easy dating multiple partners at once. A lot of guys would be said to have a word for a girl like that—keeping to an awful double standard as they have no such word for a guy. But at the heart of it all I am just a girl trying to date as many guys as possible to increase my odds of finding a man that is going to make me feel like the gem of a woman that I really am.
Book gem: This book shows you how to face your fears and doubts and find your Diamond self. Now THAT is a real gem that can never be taken away from you once it is found and tucked away inside you.
So there you have it! 10 awesome books that will help you deal with all the craziness of the modern dating world. Most of them can be found here: 10 of the Best Books for Dating-Relationships
I bet you’re wondering if any of these books really helped me find my one and only, as that IS the goal, right? To get help finding a loving partner that will see you through to the end?
Well, to be honest, it hasn’t yet. But I have met a lot of people I otherwise would not have met and I helped avoid people that are not meant for me. I do believe that when the time is right, the advice taken from each and every one of these books will help me recognize him. As I’m sure he will recognize that I’m perfect for him. Only time will tell if I’m right but if there is anything that I have gained from these books, it’s that there truly is someone out there that was perfectly designed to match each and everybody else. These books help you figure out the best way to find him in a world of billions.
I wish you well on your journey to finding your one-and-only.
Kissy oxoxo